For a few months now the Lord has been speaking to me about being “present”. Since that time I have really been made aware of how much of my life has been regretting the past or focusing/fretting on the not yet arrived future, all the while missing the precious moments I was living here and now!
I was struggling with frustration and had no idea why I was always irritable and frustrated. I was continuously thinking about something: an upcoming class I needed to prepare for, what we were going to eat next week, what I was going to blog about, plans to be made with friends, my life was swirling with planning our future. I would get short with my kids because they would interrupt or need something from me….didn’t they realize I had meals to plan, people to call, and classes to prepare. It would really bug me that they would interrupt my swirling whirling mind.
If I wasn’t thinking about what was coming up I was dwelling on bad choices I had made, things I did not gotten done that I “should” have, and I would wallow in a pool of self pity! Then my kids would come up and ask to play a game or play dough and I would respond with “not right now” (didn’t they know I was way to “down” to play). Then there was the overwhelmed with life past and future, that put me in overdrive. Trying to “DO” everything and getting nothing done. This always resulted in an exhausted, exhasperated, mama!
All this swirling and whirling in my mind kept me from being “PRESENT” in my home, with my family, with friends, ever. I was always preoccupied, I was NEVER present. I was missing LIFE! So, when I heard the Lord speak to me and say, “Be Present.” I just had no idea how to start.
However, God is so good that He gently and kindly helped me move into the present and I will never go back! It began with recognizing that I was not present. All of a sudden I would realized that my kids were talking and I had no idea what they were saying because I was in my head. More and more I began to realize that all these thought were interfering with me enjoying the moment and being “PRESENT”.
After this revelation came I began to “STOP” and be “PRESENT”. I would literally wake up in the morning and when my kids got up I would purposely stop what I was doing, go over to them, chat with them, snuggle them up and BE present! Thought would bombard my mind but I just started to ignore them and really FOCUS on who was in front of me at that moment. Moment by moment it got easier and easier to turn off the worlds of past and future and BE PRESENT with my kids!
Then all of a sudden I would notice when I was cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, etc…those negative thoughts of the past would creep in or things to do for the future. So, I decided that I was going to BE “PRESENT” when doing my daily “mom stuff”. I literally would have to tell my thoughts to stop and I would talk to myself about how grateful I was to have a wash machine or how thankful I was for healthy food for my family. I would literally talk to myself. And in time I started Being “PRESENT” in my daily “mom stuff” as well.
Then I started to dream again… I then found myself doing laundry and no longer talking to myself but dreaming. Dreaming of things that had long ago been buried because the busyness of life had drown them out. I began to dream about little inner city children. I would see their faces, picture them learning to read, write, filled with joy. I dreamt about teaching thousands of people about food, healthy life styles, and emotions.
I dreamt about essential oils and how they were helping me so much. One dream after another flooding mind day in and day out as I did my “mom stuff” , so much better than dwelling in my past or worrying about my future. The more I focused on my dreams the more they began to materialize.
For example I was dreaming about what I could do for schooling in natural health. I was really feeling a tug towards aromatherapy. I found a class that was four days later and $170. I did not have $170 to go, but I started dreaming about going. I would see my self walking up, registering, and sitting down in the class. I prayed and told God I really wanted to go, but I didn’t have the money to go so He would have to fund it if He wanted me to go. Two days later a friend handed me a check for $167! Seriously, God is so good!
I also started to dream and visualize my kids loving each other abundantly, being full of joy, enjoying each other. I also prayed for this. Then just last night I found 4 of my kids all playing apples to apples together, having so much fun! Laughing, loving & enjoying each other!
Delight yourself in the Lord; And He will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4) The more I delight in Him and in the present moment He has given me the more I see the manifestation of this in my life. It is so cool!
I am so thankful that I am living in the “PRESENT” more than I ever have. I am trusting God with my future and living one day at a time and totally LOVING IT! I feel soooooooo free. I am enjoying my kids and my husband more and falling more deeply in love with each one everyday. I can say that everyday I now have a heart connection with each one!!!!
Take steps to start being “PRESENT”! It is the greatest gift we can give our families and ourselves. It is so great to live life instead of missing it!